Rumberos

Hot Tamale Rating: 3
(1=worst, 5=best)

"Frou-frou" doesn't begin to express the inherent pretentiousness of what, without modern art, iconic photographs, antique kitsch, and strategic mood lighting, could easily be imagined as just another hole-in-the wall joint. The exorbitant prices also helped to separate this "Latin" establishment from other Mexican/El Salvadorian restaurants on the block. But the fanciness didn't end with the upscale appearances and prices; the "presentation" of the food in addition to taste is also an important marker at Rumberos. That is, if your food ever arrives...

Our culinary adventure started off promisingly enough. As the Tex-Mex-Trio and friends arrived, our compadres gathered at the bar to take advantage of the happy hour specials on a variety of beers from Latin America, as well as on mixed drinks and mojitos. Yum! Jason treated himself to an Argentine Quilmes beer, which, even with runaway Argentinean-style inflation, probably didn't cost anywhere near four dollar happy hour "special" price to produce, but regardless, it was smooth, refreshing, and all together worth it.

Leaving the bar, we were seated at a corner table with a prime, people-watching view of the street. Our dining experience began to unravel early, when we learned that the happy hour specials were only good at the bar. Bad play Rumberos. Glancing at the menu as the waiter delivered rustic white bread with olive oil to our table -- in place of the standard chips and salsa -- it became clear that this wasn't just a run of the mill Mexican restaurant with a face-lift, but a whole other beast.

The best way to understand Rumberos is by analogy, comparing Rumberos to Italian restaurants of today. Forty or fifty years ago, Italian restaurants were the hole-in-the-wall places that many other Mexican restaurants are today; places where you went for good food, in great quantities, without consideration for appearances. A generation later, however, Italian restaurants have gentrified, as the children and grandchildren of immigrants have prospered and become more affluent. Rumberos sets the trend of Mexican restaurant evolution, that we are likely to witness as Latino communities achieve greater prosperity over time, as Italian communities did in the last half of the 20th century. End societal culinary history lesson.

But more than just a fancy version of common Mexican restaurants in the area, Rumberos is also an amalgamation of the South American dishes into a unified Latin cuisine, much like Indian restaurants blend southern Indian, Kashmir, and Punjab flavors into what is labeled as "Indian."
Reviewing the menu, Alice and Jason decided to order and share several appetizers for their dinner. However, for service strike one – the appetizers arrived in advance of everyone else's meal, in spite of specifying that their set of appetizers was going to be their dinner.

Of the selections, Jason most enjoyed the Platano Relleno, baked plantain stuffed with mozzarella cheese, Venezuelan Zuleano style, and the Yuca frita with mojo sauce. The yucca was quite tender and moist with a hint of lemon, while the plantains smothered with cheese were sweet and savory. The Camarones Caribenos al ron, sautéed spicy shrimp with lemon, fresh herbs and flamed with dark rum, were very tasty. To round out their selection, Jason and Alice also sampled the Patacon Rumba, grilled flank steak with peppers, onions, tomatoes, and mashed green plantains. The steak was incredibly flavorful and tender. Without a doubt, the food was tasty, but the portions were decidedly small, even for appetizers.

Service strike two – Jaime, who actually ordered an appetizer as an appetizer, didn’t get his food until about 15 minutes later. He started with the Arepa de Aguacate, a grilled corn cake filled with avocado, red pepper, onion, tomato, white cheese, sour cream and mayonnaise. The roasted corn flavor of the arepa, a South American treat, stood up well to the creamy, fatty flavors of the stuffing, but the size of the appetizer left something to be desired. For an entrée, he had the Ropa Vieja, a Cuban stew of shredded beef served with black beans, white rice and a fried yellow plantain. The dish was a great blend of savory, sweet and starchy and the perfect pick for a cold night. (Would I have it again? Definitely.) Jaime washed it all down with a couple of Negro Modelos.

And Anna's dinner? It never came…

What’s that you say? Anna’s dinner never came? Was she sick? Was she sticking with ice water and Mexican lemon wedges in order to watch her girlish figure? Sadly, no. Anna ordered dinner, in fact, she even asked the waiter for his advice. She had narrowed the choices down to Ropa Vieja (an old favorite) and something a little more upscale to go along with the ambience – Camarones y Langosta al Ajillo (Per the menu since she never actually got to taste it: “Jumbo shrimp and lobster tail in garlic, parsley, white whine, and lemon juice sauce).

The waiter recommended the Shrimp and Lobster, so Anna said, “that sounds great – I’ll have the Camarones” (while pointing at it under the Entrée section of the menu). But , the shrimp never came. The lobster never came. What the waiter did bring for Anna was an appetizer order of Calamari. Not a big deal, Anna can understand that mistakes happen and she waited patiently for her meal.

However, after waiting and waiting, and watching everyone – Alice, Jason, Jaime, friends Dave and Cortney, finish their delicious looking meals, Anna finally canceled her order. After 2.5 hours in Rumberos, Anna had neither eaten nor received any sort of apology from the waiter or management. She came for a relaxing evening with good friends and good food, but she ended up going home stressed and hungry. Stressed AND hungry!

And, to top it all off, service strike number four – we had to send the bill back twice for corrections. And that’s after they refused to split the check when Alice and Jason had to leave early.

Taken together, Rumberos offered a cozy, elegant atmosphere with tantalizing appetizers and delicious main courses. The portions, value, and above all service (or utter lack of it) will leave you wanting, though.

Rating:





• Location and Atmosphere: 4.5

Close to metro, great mood lighting, cool stuff on walls.




• Service: 0

Why did you charge me for two meals when mine never came!




• Cost and Value: 2

See the nickel-filet comparison above.




• La Comida: 4

Quite impressive and delicious.





Hot Tamale Rating: 3

Would go back for happy hour specials at the bar.

Gloria's Pupuseria

Hot Tamale Rating: 3
(1=worst, 5=best)

From the look of the place from the street, with bars on the windows and next door to mildly dilapidated brick buildings on 14th street north of the Columbia Heights metro station, you'd think Gloria's Pupuseria Restaurant was just a dank hole-in-the-wall. However, the narrow gated entranceway opens into a bright, colorful, cheery interior. Turquoise paint and tropical print tablecloths drape the walls and tables, touristy poster pin-ups of El Salvador and the requisite religious icons proudly adorn the walls, and Selena watches over the patrons from the prominently hung canvas in the middle of the room.

Once situated, we were dismayed to find no chips and salsa put in front of us. However, as Jaime pointed out, chips and salsa are a Mexican restaurant tradition and aren't found in the gastronomical commensalisms of El Salvadorian cuisine. Anna wasn’t buying it. As she sees it, if the place serves tacos, they should also provide complimentary chips and salsa. End of story.

Were there any doubts about the authenticity of Gloria's, the waitress (was she Gloria herself???) spoke only Spanish, which was no problem for the brilliant linguists Alice, Jaime and Anna, but Gloria’s lingau franca (or shall we say lingua spagnola?) did pose a minor challenge for minorly challenged Jason, who was able to order but only give the deer in headlights wide-eye-stare to questions from the waitress.

In addition to a plate of pupusas for the whole table ("when in a pupuseria, eat a pupusa"), Jason ordered Yuca con Chicharronne – rounds of fried yucca and chunks of pork with a salsa-like salad of cabbage and finely diced tomatoes. It wasn't bad. The yucca wasn't yucky, the pork was flavorful but a rather dry, and the salsa salad complemented the rest of the meal nicely. The horchata was tasty, but pretty gritty. In all, Jason was a bit underwhelmed.

Anna had a shredded beef dish cushioned between a healthy portion of beans and rice. The beef, cooked with a mix of tomatoes, green peppers, and egg was good, but a little tough. The egg was an interesting and tasty addition to the beef. Also on the plate was a nice slice of avocado and goat cheese. Overall, Anna enjoyed her meal, but thought it a bit unexciting. It tasted like a pot roast with slight hint of Mexican (well in this case, El Salvadoran) flavors, which, although tasty, did not wow her. And Anna likes to be wowed.

Jaime had the Pollo Guisado (Stewed Chicken) and disappointment doesn’t begin to describe his reaction. The dish consisted of three hefty pieces of bone-in dark meat in a tomato and onion sauce. The sauce, while tasty, could not save the chicken. Surprisingly dry and tough for stewed pieces of meat, the chicken meat took a bit of effort to strip from the bone and wasn’t really worth it. Rice, beans and a hunk of El Salvadoran cheese accompanied the chicken and were adequate. The highlights of his meal were the hearty papusa appetizer and cold Modelo beer.

All agreed that the pupusas were pretty good, but again, not exceptional. It should be noted that prices are low at Gloria's with few entrees over $10, and that you are give a full (Chinese print) plate of food. While the food at Gloria's isn't great, it's certainly not horrible. If you're looking for decent pupusas at the right price and if you don’t mind eating leathered meat, Gloria's is your place!

Rating:




• Location and Atmosphere: 3

Close to metro, some kitsch, not so good people watching.



• Service: 3

Solid service, but you better brush up on your Spanish before coming!



• Cost and Value: 5

Generous portions with most everything around $10.



• La Comida: 2

"Underwhelming," "Unexciting," "Disappointing."




Hot Tamale Rating: 3

Would probably only go back to say "hi" to Selena...

Taqueria del Distrito Federal

Hot Tamale Rating: 4
(1=worst, 5=best)

Stepping down from the street into Taqueria del Distrito Federal, you enter another world thousands of miles away. Sitting in Taqeria, you could easily imagine yourself in a cozy corner restaurant in the capital of Mexico, forgetting that you're still in the capital of the United States.

The authenticity of the atmosphere simply can't be matched – green, white and red tiles wrap around the walls, similarly colored streamers line the ceiling, and a variety of photos from classic Mexican cinema along with a wide array of handicrafts and other cultural artifacts proudly hang on the congested walls. Aside from the standard kitsch or sombreros and souvenirs, there are a number of genuine relics, including a shrine to the Virgin of Guadalupe, complete with lit candles and burning incense.

Taqueria is a truly mom'n'pop, or shall we say mami y papi, no frills place. If you've come looking for the amenities you may take for granted at other establishments, such as air-conditioning, attentive wait staff, and complementary water, you've definitely come to the wrong place. But what's ostensibly lacking in service, the Tex-Mex-Trio unanimously agrees is more than made up in the quality, value and deliciousness of la comida.

The first item to catch our tastebuds was the thin, green salsa. The waitress explained that it's made out of avocados, and the trained tongue would also suggest copious amounts of cilantro – not to spicy, but decidedly flavorful. Thankfully, our entrees arrive promptly, keeping us from filling up too much on the chips and salsa.

Jason ordered the Alambre Espanol, a stir-fry of sorts, made up of ground chorizo sausage, bite-sized slices of well-seasoned chicken, fresh onions, thinly slice fresh jalapeños, fresh diced tomatoes, smothered with melted cheese and served with beans and rice. "Fresh" and "spicy" were the key adjectives describing Jason's meal.

As a warning to those with weak palettes, intolerant of spiciness (you know who you are!), be mindful that the homemade dishes at Taqueria come hot and only hot! Be sure to ask your server whether the dish you intend to order is hot or not. You'll thank us!

Having mopped up the residual grease and beans with soft, homemade corn tortillas, Jason finished his meal with a clean plate and sweaty face – indications of a good, hot, and spicy meal.

Taking advantage of this being a taqueria, Jaime ordered a plate of three tacos; tripa (beef tripe), chicarron (pork skin) en salsa verde and pork al pastor. Besides a generous portion of meat, the tacos all came dressed with cilantro, avocado and raw onion and shared the plate with slices of radish and cucumber and wedges of lime. The tripas lacked the crispiness that Jaime prefers, but still contained loads of tripey goodness. Tender and spicy, the pork al pastor brought back memories of south Texas taquerias and did not suffer by the comparison. The chicharron, though, beat the other two tacos, hands down. Slippery and soft bits of pork skin doused in an aggressive green sauce more than held their own against the raw onion sprinkled in the taco and, unlike its meaty brethren, required no additional spicing. Jaime washed everything down with a glass of Jamaica (iced hibiscus tea). The sweet/slightly sour tea paired with the spicy food beautifully.

Would Jaime get it again? If we went back, he would try and get a burrito of the chicharron.

After the shocking self-discovery of her own unrefined tastes for sophisticated flavors, Anna decided to play it safe at Taqueria del Distrito Federal. And it doesn’t get much safer than fried tacos aka “Tacos Dorados.” Three fried corn tacos filled with pork hidden below a fluffy blanket of lettuce, cheese, tomatoes, and sour cream. The meal was filling and tasty. It was also one of the unspicy meals on the menu, so if you aren’t feeling very adventuress, and don’t enjoy a kick to your food, Tacos Dorados are the way to go.

Since margaritas, or anything alcoholic, are not on the menu at el Distrito, Anna drowned her sorrows in a big glass (ok, styrofoam cup) of cold and refreshing Marañon. After hitting up the card catalogue at her local public library (ok, google), Anna found out why Marañon tastes nutty yet sweet – it’s made out of a nutty fruit. Marañon, also called a cashew fruit, has its origins in Brazil.* The TexMex trio recommends trying and sharing amongst your friends all of the freshly made, Latin American beverages.

Freshness, zestiness, and spiciness were the themes that connected all the dishes. There was no denying that the ingredients, especially the vegetables, were all freshly prepared, and hadn't been sitting around all day pre-sliced and -diced. Tempering the spiciness and washing down the good food with homemade, cinnamony-sweet horchata, the Tex-Mex-Trio and friends left Taqueria del Districo Federal quite satisfied and well satiated!

Rating:




• Location and Atmosphere: 4

Close to metro, lots of cool kitsch, but not A/C.




• Service: 2

No complementary water, you really need to ask for everything.




• Cost and Value: 5

Generous portions, nothing over $10.




• La Comida: 5

Unique green salsa, incredible food, interesting beverages!





Hot Tamale Rating: 4

Couldn't justify a "5" due to service, but an excellent restaurant nonetheless!

*cashew apple = cashew fruit = marañon = merey = caju = cajueiro Notes: This Brazilian fruit looks like a squishy apple with an odd-looking stem growing out of it. According to botanists, though, the grayish "stem" is actually the fruit, and it encloses the kidney-shaped cashew nut that we're familiar with. The cashew apple is the yellowish-orange part that's attached to the fruit. Cashew apples are juicy but somewhat astringent due to a high concentration of tannin. Be careful of the grayish fruit that encloses the nut. It contains toxic oils.

Catti

Hot Tamale Rating: 3
(1=worst, 5=best)

Plastic flowered vases on green and white checked tablecloths, a telenovela on the big screen, and Mexican music blaring several decibels too loud - those are the first impressions your senses register as you enter Catti on 14th at Parkwood Pl. NW.

The Tex-Mex-Trio, along with friends Alice, Adam, and Kelly (Billy was conspicuously absent...), were seated upstairs on the balcony overlooking the bar, the big screen and a wall of smaller TVs.

Later, when we left, Kelly commented that "We're the most interesting thing to walk into this restaurant tonight." Kelly's assessment was pretty much spot on. The clientele was all males, sitting at the bar or tables - by themselves - face deep in cerveza with eyes on cell phones, televisions, or flitting over the female wait staff.

Speaking of the wait staff, their service was quite good. In spite of our poor waitress having to continually ascend the stairs to check on us, and run down and back up again to fetch more salsa, margaritas or water, we were rarely in want of anything.

As we waited for the margaritas to arrive, a man in black approached our table and asked if it was our first time here. We replied that it in fact was.

"Oh, cuz I thought you were that guy ... that I hassled 'bout lookin' too young to drink. I said I'd buy him four drenks if he ever got back in here."

This place clearly had character.

The chips and salsa came - ostensibly out of a bag and out of a can, respectively. Nothing to write home about. The margaritas arrived too and were pretty decent.

While the food had thus far been largely unremarkable, the entree made up for what was lacking, at least in Jason's case. Jason had requested Cecina Estilo Yec... something, something. Because he couldn't recognize any words when he ordered, nor pronounce them, he automatically assumed it would be great. His unpronounceable meal turned out to be skirt steak with refried beans, stick-of-butter shaped cheese, an avocado, zesty red sauce on the side, and home made tortillas. The beef was tender and flavorful, the avocado soft and buttery and the beans were fresh and almost creamy.

Jaime ordered Puerco en Salsa Verde. The plate contained equal portions of refried beans, rice and chunks of pork in salsa verde, a garnish of shredded iceberg lettuce and an accompaniment of two thick corn tortillas. The beans, a pleasant surprise, tasted homemade, rather than canned, and paired well with the tortillas. The slightly under cooked rice disappointed, but did serve as an adequate vehicle to collect any excess salsa verde. The Salsa Verde was the real point of this plate. The chunks of pork combined a thin, crispy covering over a tender-fatty morsel, but they took a backseat to the bright and spicy Salsa.

Would Jaime order it again?

"Probably, but I’d like to try some of the other items on the menu that looked interesting," Jaime explained.

Anna tried Camarones del Diablo which were spicy shrimp covered with a smoky chipotle sauce. The shrimp were large, tasty, and there were plenty of them. Instead of beans, Anna was presented with a pleasant, fresh salad with tomatoes and cucumbers.

Our fellow compadres all tried and enjoyed el Diablo, but alas, Anna learned a hard life lesson this evening – "I don't like smoky chipotle sauce."

Our friends who joined us highly recommend the seafood fajitas and the chicken mole. However, Anna was also saddened to discover that, like the smoky chipotle, the mole didn't agree with her unrefined palate either.

The Mexican dude-ranch music progressively gave way to Mexican pop-rock as our plates cleared, our margaritas emptied, and our first Mexican Restaurant dinning experience came to an end.

Rating:




• Location and Atmosphere: 2

Medium distance from metro; Too loud!



• Service: 4

Slow with chips and salsa, otherwise good.



• Cost and Value: 3

Little pricey, but big portions. You will not leave hungry.



• La Comida: 3

Mediocre chips and bad salsa. Margarita didn't use the best tequila and the taste of the margarita mix lingered long after the meal. Entrées were by and large very good, though.




Hot Tamale Rating: 3

Solid three, would definitely come back.

Our Criteria

Please see below our carefully considered, scientific rating scheme for the restaurants we visit. As you will notice, we made every effort to include all key criteria of the dining experience, weighting the most critical factors. You'll find this survey included in each restaurant review.

Location and Atmosphere: 15%

1) Atmosphere

2) People Watching Possibilities of Restaurant Clientele and/or Passersby - to be judged based on two factors:

a. attractiveness

b. interesting-ness

3) Location/Accessibility

Service: 15%

4) Service

a. Regular Food/Drink Service

b. Nacho/Salsa service

Cost and Value: 20%

5) Cost

a. Bang for your buck

b. Worth your first born

Food and Drink: 50%

6) La comida

a. Salsa/Nachos

b. Hot sauce

c. Entrée

d. Margaritas

Overall Hot Tamale Rating: _____

Our Story

Back in the spring of 2007, Jason moved from the Eastern Market in DC across the river to the Del Ray neighborhood in Alexandria, Virginia. Upon settling in to the neighborhood, Jason soon discovered the abundance of Mexican restaurants, including Mexican Restaurant #1, Mexican Restaurant #2, and Mexican Restaurant #3, so named/numbered based on their distance from Jason’s house. To this day, Jason has failed to learn their real names.

In this row of restaurants on Mt. Vernon Ave., Jason quickly envisioned a quest to accomplish and recognized a lure to get his DC friends to come visit him: a Mexican Restaurant tour, trying out a new restaurant every month!

The original crowd included Anna, Jaime, Alison and Jason, and subsequent stops included guest appearances of other friends. Anna, with her trusty notebook, critically rated each visit on an astonishing number of criteria, while all who were present tasted and provided commentary.

As the walk from the metro to subsequent Mexican Restaurants began to take over 25 minutes, the tour ended, and the core cadre and fellow friends never made it to Mexican Restaurant #4…

That was 2007.

2008 ushered in another year and another move for Jason. Back to the city, in Columbia Heights, Jason discovered a cornucopia of Mexican restaurants, beyond his hungriest dreams. In the largely Latino working class neighborhood, beyond the new Target and new development jazz, one can find a Taqueria or Pupusaria on nearly every corner!

From the hole in the wall at the top of the street, to the frou-frou looking bistro by the metro, the Mexican restaurant culinary encounters seem limitless!

With the wide field of Mexican Restaurants before us, we felt it time to take things to the next level and time to share our adventures and findings with all of you. Follow us as we explore DC’s Mexican Restaurants and discover new gastronomical treasures!

Yours truly,

The Tex-Mex Trio
Anna, Jaime, and Jason